Have you seen the muffin pan??

So Bellini eats similar to the way a steam shovel operates. Packet will eat and eat and eat. They get stuffed and eat too much because they are eating too quickly. I discussed the eating issues with my wonder vet. He recommended we start putting the cat food in a muffin pan to slow down the gobbling four leggids. The kitties hate the muffin pan. The muffin pan works. No more bulimic cat barf around the house.

My Second Trip to Africa

As you may recall I last visited Africa about this time of year in 2006.
Last night a huge storm swept through the booming metropolis of Marietta. The power went out around 9pm and came back on sometime in the middle of the night. Of course we had an overnight guest. I notice the house was warmer than usual, but dismissed it as the AC not working due to the power outage. There were huge branches down all over the place. I took two hours to clean up the yard today. A neighbor up the street has pretty bad damage from a tree coming down on the house. I came back in from yard work and thought it was warm, but I dismissed it again reminding myself I just shlepted limbs from all over the yard to the curb and pushed a broom since the blower is on the fritz.
The house is currently 85 degrees. Of course it is late Sunday, so it is slim pickings of who will come fix it and I am sure it will come with a premium when the Coolray man gets here.
To add insult to injury the Fab Hub is in San Fran and says it is too cold and he may need to buy a sweatshirt and jeans. As I wipe the sweat from my brow I dream of 60 degree weather.
Just pondering how much this will set us back. We just dropped $5k on tree removal so it would not surprise me if this time it needs replacement.....
The naked cat is in heaven.

And it was all Yellow

Our city is full of yellow dirt. It is nasty. There are clumps of pollen buds along the side of the road the way you see seaweed on the beach. We finally got some rain today. I had the air filter changed on my car earlier this week. The guy said it weighed three times more than what it should have. My car is yellow. The water in the street is yellow from washing down the street. Everything is yellow. Yuck.

DWTS 2008

Okay, the dancers are bigger stars than the "stars". Whatever. I like the shiny outfits, hair, makeup and dancing. I am watching for Cheryl, Julianne, and Karina.

RIP Brandy

Brandy passed away on St. Patrick's day. Not really unexpected, but none the less sad. 20 years is a great run for a cat. Cheers, Brandy.

9 Lives

My father died an odd death back in 2001. It was unexpected. He was not married and was not close to anyone. My mother (divorced from him for 20 years), my step mom (divorced from him for 10 years) and I (had not spoken in a few years) all went down to clean out the apartment and take care of things. I am an only child, so the mess was mine. Over the long weekend we drank several pitchers of margaritas and laughed. He left his life insurance to a friend. She was nice enough to give it to me anyways. With that I bought my first home by myself.
My step mom and father had a cat. They got Brandy when I was 8 years old. When they split my father kept the cat. When my father died I took Brandy back to Atlanta with me. I had two other geriatric cats at the time that were confused and scared of the new addition. My uncle (brother of my father and had not spoken to my father in decades) took Brandy. Mom took her up to his house. This year my uncle lost his house. Brandy stayed in his room at my grandmother's house for a few days. My uncle and grandmother delivered Brandy here a week and a half ago. As you can see this cat has been with just about everyone in the family at some point, including my aunt and uncle in Savannah.
She is about 19 years old, so first things first I took her to the vet. She was very skinny and full of hair mats. The vet took one look and knew the problem. I was thinking she would recommend to put her down. Brandy had a hyperthyroid issue, but otherwise is in good health. $265 later it was time to set up for surgery to fix the problem. The surgery went fine and while she was under they shaved her down to get the mats out. I now have 1.5 naked cats. The surgery was over $700. I could not feel good about myself to put a cat down that still has quality of life just because it is cheaper. I am not saying money is no object, but I just could not sleep. I am kind of weird about making that call, when my father died I was the one that made the call to pull the plug since I was the only family member. Rather full circle, huh? So I have a cat that will put on some weight and be a good kitty.

Whatever, I've been super fly busy

It seems like it was just Thanksgiving......It really has been a blur for me.
The first weekend of December I got to jet set up to Raleigh for the Christmas party by the fab hub's new office. I was there for less than 24 hours. The flight up was the worst thing for me in travel history. I had never had a bad travel day before. I aways fly out of and into Atlanta so not much bad can happen. They are the Mussolini of airports: the planes will run on time!
I get on the plane. Sit by the window in the row of three seats. Then it happens: a screaming child is on the lap of the lady next to me. And guess who is beside her? Yeah, her stupid sister with another stupid crying baby. The babies crying activates a little yappy chihuahua that is seated under the seat beside me. It is my own personal Hell. Did I mention that we were stuck for an hour? We were. We took off after we should have already landed. The worst ever.
The second weekend of December we had our 4th annual Holiday Warm Up Christmas Party. I had champagne pomegranate punch that people were licking the bottom of the bowl for and Hypntq Glacier Drop Martinis that were super yummy. The food was so good that when I was cleaning up around midnight I could not find a bite to eat.
Last weekend we hit Lenox and Phipps for some fabulous Christmas shopping. I highly recommend "Would you Rather.....?" as a super good stocking stuffer. Get the small travel size one...no need for the board and hoopla because you will not use it. Would you rather shave your dad's ass or your mother's bikini??
This weekend we tie up the loose ends and Mom comes in on Sunday. It is a blur.
I have been working my ass off. I have a pending of 193. I pray to sweet baby 8 pound Jesus that it does not hit 200....alas, I am the only person there next week in litigation---Joy! The upside to all this work is that firms are very nice in sending offerings to us this time of year. We had a breakfast sent, pounds and pounds of chocolate (the gold Godiva basket has a special place in my heart) and then there is the non sense we will never use but it is a trinket that I hold as a prize. If anyone ever needs a tiny mag light give me a shout, your choice of colors.

Games Galore

I will not tell you how much time I have logged playing this game....too much. I love it. There is skee ball, the coin push game, a dunk booth, toss a coin onto plates and super wonder prizes. I am simply addicted. It is so much fun. The GA State Fair is here next week....I have my practice in....I can't wait.

Hotter than two rats screwing in a wool sock

Yeah, that's right. It is hot as effing hell here. The humidity and smog does not help. Think I will go have a heat stroke doing yard work.

What I am

What I am thinking: I have shit in my own barn. Sometimes it really stinks. Still not sure if I meant to do it. I may have a mess to clean up.
What I am listening to: Anything from 30 Seconds to Mars or Muse
What I am reading: Endless demands. Cruise searching.
What I am watching: I am in withdrawal from Grey's Anatomy & Desperate Housewives. I have a new summertime addiction: Criss Angel
What is up at work: Case load of 140+ currently has me stressed out. I need to get my junk together for CPCU.
What I think about season finales: Edie can hang. George better be back. Can't wait to see Kitty's wedding.
What I am worried about: The opportunities that may come. Falls under the "be careful what you wish for" school of thought.
What I looking forward to: Girl's weekend, drinks, the beach, Steve & Barry's
What I am dreaming about: Metamorphosis
What I am eating: Anything from J. Christopher's
What I am in denial about: My birthday last week.
What I am sick of: The smoke from South GA smoothering the city. It is 200 miles away and you would think there was a fire in your yard when you walk outside. Yuck.

Community Service

So I owed a close friend a favor. Or more so, the fab hub was the one in debit.
DP was so kind as to lend his skill and know how to make it possible for us to have a HUGE party deck for last 4th of July party. A ton of sweat and tears went into this. We have a huge 700 sq ft deck. It is beautiful. It was our turn.....
I helped plan and execute a rocking hillside garden. There was nothing but weeds and scrub bushes and some stupid cypress trees. I picked out some butterfly bushes for the top, Shasta daisies and a yellow clumping daisy called Jethro Tull and lantana that is very hardy for freezing temps to fill in and make a pretty garden for humming birds and butterflies that will be drought friendly and low maintenance to come back every year and look great. It was damn near 90 degrees and this hillside garden made me feel like a mountain goat. MMMAaaaaah......I think I got off easy given the trade.

Tacky......Really Tacky......

The neighbor has "grown" more garden. There are hanging baskets with fake flowers running over and new crap in pots that will never need to be watered, just keep an eye on the sun bleaching. The back porch has never looked better with such a nice array of fake plants. Really, somebody needs to have a talk with her. I think an anonymous letter may be dropped in the mail. Horrid....horrid fake plants are multiplying. Not sure if they put out plastic pollen....

The Worst Two Weeks Ever

I know you think I am a lazy slack ass and do not care about you any more. My world has been turned upside down. What I knew as my happy normal came crashing down. I will get you guys an update and try and fill you in. On Monday, March 12 we took Bellini in for her breathing issue. I thought it was a pollen allergy. Surprise! It was a polyp growing from her ear canal to her pharynx. Horror! It had to come out and it had to be tested for the "c word". We left her for the surgery where the vet went in with a scope and no incision was made when he pulled the polyp off the stalk for removal. I went to pick her up and she was still VERY groggy from the anesthesia. So groggy and crank she would not go into the carrier. I kept her in my arms at the vet's office for over an hour. Finally I called the fab hub and he picked us up as she slept in my arms the entire ride home. She would wake up every 45 minutes or so and fight me for a minute and the go back to sleep. This went on until at least midnight. She slept in my arm all night. She made no effort to walk or anything for the next day. We took her back to the vet. The vet believes she had a anesthesia stroke event. You could sweep the pieces of my heart off the floor. We were hand feeding her baby food 3 times a day and having to give her fluids to her back with a drip bag and needle. It made a water hump like a camel. She would walk a little bit. She could not see. She could not hear.
It has been almost two weeks now. She is walking and trotting around. She is eating on her own. She started drinking for the first time yesterday. She made her first crawl up on to the couch. She still is not seeing well. When the vet pulled out the polyp one of her facial nerves was pulled a bit and her 3rd eyelid is still showing and the pupil in that eye is slower to react to light. She looks a little off. Like a naked Helen Keller or a lost Roomba bumping into things.
She is purring and making a little meow sound. I just hope for a full recovery. Two weeks is a long time to wait. Watching her slowly get better is great, but it really is taking too long. All my efforts and time have gone into Bellini---I am sure you understand.

With Love, Jon & Andrea

We live in a city just North of Atlanta. We are in a wonderful historic neighborhood. Our home was built in the 1890's. We share a driveway with our neighbor. The house has been vacant more than it has been occupied since we moved in almost 4 years ago. Our newest neighbor is a lease purchaser. I have been a very patient person. I have been wanting to tell you about her Innter Net, but I did not want to act prematurely. So let me pry my hands off of my lips.....
This new neighbor is a mess. A huge mess. Please Innter Net, tell me if I am wrong.
She moved in the first week of January. The fab hub helped her install a mailbox. This was our second time meeting them. This was the time that the fab hub's name was solidified: Jon (pronounced Jawn). No, that is not his name.
She came over again to borrow the drill. Jon advised of his correct name and showed her how to use the drill. She has been doing all kinds of home improvement over there. My personal favorite are the fake flowers "planted" in the front yard. I know the weather is all crazy and warm, but nothing says Winter like having a full blooming yard of silk flowers. She put a milk can on the front porch. Charming! Then there are the Mother In-Laws Tongue she planted outside. This is an indoor plant. It currently has a bag over it to protect it from tonight's frost. The yard is a train wreck which I believe will only get worse.
This neighbor of mine is probably in her mid 60s and is the poster child of bad plastic surgery. Really, do not go save a buck in Mexico. Her lips are like wet bags plastered on her face. She needs to get more collagen injected in there asap. She looks like a New Yorker that retired to Florida, but decided to work again and move to Atlanta.
Her daughter lives there too. She is probably in her early 30s and is mentally handicap. She hugs the fab hub when he comes home. I may need to worry about "the other woman". She has already shown him her new room.
They were parking the car directly behind the SmurFJ for a while. That finally stopped. Then there was the mammoth pile of trash in the driveway for two weeks. It should be an interesting year. Did I mention she claims to be an interior designer??

Saturday

Since it feels like Spring time here in Atlanta (please see An Inconvenient Truth), I decided to start some Spring cleaning. I went through two closets and I have even listed some stuff in craigslist.org. Then the phone rang....

"We're here!"

"Where?"

"In the airport. Come have lunch."

Yay! I got to see my ex-step mom. I adore her and do not get to see her enough. She lives in Connecticut and was headed to Daytona with a lay over in Atlanta.

That was the best surprise since getting a cotton candy machine

La La La La La La

The end of the year is car shopping time and the fab hub and I have done just that. It was time for the Acura to go. After having a few conversations about bio diesel and Elements the fab hub decided on a Toyota FJ. I called dealers from North Atlanta to Savannah working numbers. I found my object of desire at World Toyota on Peachtree Industrial. We went and I was the good little wife. Sat in the back during the test drive and just smiled and nodded as we went over the vehicle. Then after two hours it was time. We went back into the little room. I reviewed the numbers, advised the deal will not work and this is what I need to make it happen. The finance guy tried to tell me he was on my side and this was it. Lying bastard. I waited for 2 hours to get to him. Damn straight I will get what I want.
You see, I am the Type A. I also am the car person of the family. I also happen to negotiate all day about money with attorneys.
The finance guy had left the room to go get the deal worked and the fab hub and I had a conversation:

Me: See, there is a little piranha that lives in my heart.
FH: So that is what is in there?
Me: She just comes out when needed.....

Thanks babe. We got the deal done and took delivery of a beautiful new 2007 FJ. It is blue and as you know has a white top. It looks like a Smurf. I call it "SmurFJ". I really think it would be a clever tag.
Even better to try out the new sound system the fab hub requested my Justin Timberlake CD. Oh, how nice it was blasting JT in the SmurFJ.....

The Best Thing Since......

I really love Christmas. I love the surprises, movies, family, food, cookies, trees, songs and all that Christmas goodness. Best of all I love getting a pile of gifts. For you my dear readers, I offer my Christmas review:

This hair dryer makes me have the best hair ever! Better than a Chi and made in Italy like all good things. Big thanks to Kitt (#1 hair stylist at Van Michael Salon) for helping the fab hub get this for me from the in laws.

Again, all good things come from Italy. If you have not had one of these little pieces of heaven get your ass up and go get some. They have sweet little love notes in them.

I love Justin. I don't care what you say. The fab hub hooked this up. Yummy!

I requested a certain popcorn tin for the tin this year. I got this huge tin with Santa on it. I WANTED THE FLAMINGO TIN. Do people really eat this crap? I will feed it to the office. I will try again next year . I don't want the popcorn.....just the tin. Who needs popcorn when I have hoarded so many cookies?

So I am not a fan of the French, flappy headed, frogs. I do, however, love some champagne. This is the only french contribution I will acknowledge. I believe it is pronounced, "Verve poo poo".

This is almost perfect. See, I am married to a geek. He knows every spec or will fully educate himself on every spec of anything that is quasi electronic. I wanted the Sony. We will exchange.
A self help book and a coffee mug for the fab hub and myself. We can drink coffee and learn the language of love.....um, thanks for thinking of us. Hermph....I needed a coffee mug. I was fresh out of them.....

Now who does not love a time traveling midget? I am too exhausted to expound on this. This is a train wreck that is actually my mother's white elephant gift. She was too tipsy to remember to steal the lottery tickets and ended up with midgets, time traveling midgets.

This is a sample of the Christmas goodness. I am not sharing my cookies. I probably have 5 dozen or so more to fatten myself with.

The Crown Jewel of Finials: The Flamingo

The Crown Jewel of Finials: The Flamingo
Originally uploaded by ganners.

We went to the Festival of Trees tonight. The fab hub had already been down there today unknown to me. He worked out a deal on the Radko tree topped finial. I just saw an extra box go in the bag and thought I was lucky. Oh, no.....he had worked it out. It was presented to me over pickle chips at the OK Cafe. Could the world be anymore perfect?

Girl in a Bubble

This weekend we are having all of the ceiling in the house painted (finally). When we moved in to the money pit 3 years ago we worked on everything but the ceilings. Given that they are 12 foot and I am 5'3" you can see the problem. We did the right thing and hired out for this one. The painters are hard core. They have taped off and put sheets of plastic everywhere. Thus, I am the girl in the bubble. I get stuck in a section of the house as they have rooms blocked off with plastic. I have dust everywhere and most of the ceilings are completed at this point. It looks good.

They are also scraping and painting the outside of the house. We just had it painted 2 1/2 years ago but it needs it already. The joys of an old house!!

The last thing for the money pit I really care about that is on my list is ripping out and replacing our main bathroom. I hope to do it next year.

As for now I have all the hair on my body raised as they sand the joint compound from the filled areas to make it smooth for painting and the house looks like it has Chicken Pox on the exterior.

I Can See Clearly Now

Today it finally happened.....the mammoth holly tree bush things on the side of our house are gone. I have a wonderful view from the kitchen and also from the media room. It really is nice.
Then I noticed just how good my view is.....
I can see in to the house next door. It is currently vacant and for sale. Not sure if they would be able to see into out home since we are on a slight hill.
The kitties are a bit mad at me for the tearing down of a tree that squirrels, birds and even chipmunks played in for their viewing pleasure. I am thinking an apple tree or fig tree will be planted in the area.....we will see.
The guys that pick up yard trash will be pissed...the pile is friggin' huge!